Sunday, September 30, 2012

Headlines - Sunday Sept 30

 

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"You know, I think my biggest concern, obviously, would just be for his mental well-being." I know mine sure is. Now.
 
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Former U.S. Ambassador to the United Nations and surrogate for presidential hopeful former Gov. Mitt Romney (R-MA) John Bolton harshly criticized the Obama administration's response to the violence in Benghazi, Libya earlier this month, calling the U.S. response "limp-wristed."

Former UN Ambassador John Bolton, the'70s-era Plato's Retreat Key-holder who thinks that all diplomacy begins with a bombing, knows his sexual slurs. (Raw Story)

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Believing that the debates will come down to a few key sound-bites, Romney has been memorizing and practicing "a series of zingers" that his team has written for him. Romney has practiced delivering these lines on aides since August.

All of Wingnuttia is waiting for the corpse of Saint Ronnie to rise up and bellow, "Where's the beef" or "There you go again."

For those of us who have tried open mic night, or have written jokes for stand-ups already know this: you cannot teach someone to be funny. Either they have a sense of timing, or they don't.

The one thing we know for sure about The Stench is that he has no sense of humor; each time he tries to be amusing, it's another pie in his own face, or pulling someone over while pretending to be a Highway Patrol Officer, or posing with hundred dollar bills coming out of his clothing.

I cannot believe that his campaign is trying this. It must really be a Hail Mary moment for them.

(New York Times)

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Top Romney Adviser Criticizes Obama For Not Killing Bin Laden Fast Enough

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The Stakes Are High - Hey guys, did you know that a sure-fire way to be thrown into the fiery pit to suffer for all eternity is to vote for Preznint Carebear to be re-elected? It's True!, according to Catholic Bishop Thomas John Paprocki of the Diocese of Springfield in Illinois! I musta missed the commandment that says Thou Shalt Not Vote For The Kenyan Usurper Hawaiian Devil Baby. (Raw Story)

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Poll Trutherism - OK, so Wingnuttia is re-weighting the polls because everyone knows that the pollsters are in the bag for the Kenyan Usurper and that's why he is polling higher, right? Well, then, how does one explain that the Fox News Poll has The Stench trailing by 5? Or could boring old Eugene Robinson be right:

If a polling sample shows Democrats outnumbering Republicans by, say, 32 percent to 24 percent (with most of the rest calling themselves independents), GOP partisans shouldn't worry about a conspiracy. They should worry that this is a snapshot of how Americans feel about the two major parties.

It's not the polls, it's the policies. Now that's a reason for Republicans to be depressed.

We've been saying for a while that it is not Willard that everyone hates (well, it is Willard), but it is what he is selling: the polcies of the GOP.

(Fox News)

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Wow. Fox News accidentally aired a live suicide.

This is obviously bad news for Janet Jackson's nipple.

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RNC Caught Lying on Tape.mpg

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Details

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Megachurch Pastor Jack Schapp yesterday pleaded guilty to federal charges of sex with an underage girl, but denied knowing that taking the teen across state lines was also a federal crime. Early last month Schapp was fired by Indiana's massive 15,000-member First Baptist Church.

U.S. District Judge Rudy Lozano scheduled the sentencing for Jan. 15, although Schaap, 54, has already signed a plea agreement stating that he faces at least 10 years in prison for taking a person under 18 across state lines for sex, although the maximum sentence for such a crime could be life imprisonment. The former pastor, described by the Southtown Star as wearing an orange prison garb while standing before the court, admitted to taking three trips with the teen across state lines for sexual activity, and said someone else actually drove the girl to the destinations. The married father of two was removed from his position at First Baptist Church last month after a deacon apparently found a text message on his cell phone that showed the pastor and the girl kissing. Schaap had even been counseling the girl, it was revealed.

Schapp is the author of a dating advice book for young Christian girls in which he cautions them to keep their weight down in order to attract suitors.

 

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