Guns don't kill penises, people kill penises:
A security guard is hospitalized in the city of San Fernando in the Republic of Trinidad and Tobago after accidentally discharging his weapon and shooting off his penis. According to the Trinidad and Tobago Guardian, the unnamed 33-year-old man was carrying a .38 caliber handgun in his pocket when it went off, striking him in the groin.
Police in the town of Rio Claro received a call around 8:00 a.m. on Sunday that witnesses had heard a shot coming from a parked car. Officers responding to the scene found the driver slumped at the wheel and bleeding from the injured area.
Hokay, first of all, ouch. Wonkette is very sorry for what this man is going through and we are not making fun of him, honest. That being said, the only way to stop a bad penis with a gun is with a good penis with a gun, so maybe if we posted armed penises in all
pubic public places, then everybody would be safe. READ MORE »
The duration of U.S. wars in months. Afghanistan is our first 13-year war. World War I lasted 2.
"What we have is the President who is not the President of the United States, he is president of the divided states and he relishes in dividing the states among each other. He has this famous speech that he gave during a Democratic convention several years ago when he was a state senator and he talks about 'there's not red states and blue states but the United States of America,' that's not this President. This President runs to divide people, to divide and conquer and ultimately dismantle and deconstruct. He's doing that with morality, he's doing it with marriage, he's trying to divide and conquer. Really, he is the most immoral president that we've ever had in history, pushing an immorality that is stunning." - Liberty Counsel president Mat Staver, speaking on national Christian radio.
A Brooklyn judge today meted out a harsh sentence against the Hasidic leader who was convicted last month on 59 felony counts of child molestation.
What could go wrong?